The Great Rodent Switch
by Tobiwolf13
Summary: Clark buys Chloe a pet to make up for her falling out with Lana after Hydro.


The Great Rodent Switch

When Chloe opened the door, her arms overloaded with her purse and lab top case, she gave me a quick glance and rolled her eyes. It was then that I realized that dropping in on her right after her hour's long commute and long day of lead-chasing might be hazardous to even my health.

She stood there in the doorway for a few seconds and sighed, shaking her head. "You know, I'm serious. My scare reflex? Totally gone. You've managed to neutralize my fight or flight response." She held out her arms and glared at me. "Well are you going to give a girl a hand or not?"

I grinned at her and blurred over from my spot on the couch, erm, Chloe's bed and stopped right in front of her. She just rolled her eyes again and shoved her purse in my arms. I really wasn't sure when I went from personal superhero to valet, but it was both annoying and sort of nice. I mean, it wasn't like I had a huge ego or anything but the whole running faster than the eye could see was a pretty neat trick. It used to leave Chloe star struck with her eyes wide and her mouth hanging open. Now it was more like she expected it.

It had been neat to be able to impress her.

Of course, it was also nice because she'd gotten to the point where she found everything I could do as natural and everyday as the way she hacked into medical records. I didn't think that Pete had ever really gotten to that point.

I took her purse and grimaced. "Oh, Chlo, can't I take your computer instead? This whole purse thing really isn't very manly."

Chloe's grip tightened around her computer. "This computer is my life. I don't trust anyone but me with it. Besides," she added, smirking. "You look so cute carrying it."

"If Lois catches me doing this, I'm going to disavow all knowledge of this." I replied, setting her purse down on the kitchen counter. Chloe had me so whipped.

"So?" She asked, sitting plopping down on the sofa, "What brings you over here? Didn't you have enough of the Sullivan-Lane household when you were here this morning? Besides," she sing-songed, "Your girlfriend's not even here."

I stifled the urge to roll my eyes as I reached into her fridge for a couple of bottles of water. The gesture didn't really do much if the other person couldn't see you do it. "Chloe, you aren't starting in on that again, are you?"

Her smirk widened as she leaned forward to catch the bottle of water I tossed her. "You gotta admit, Clark, the whole thing is pretty funny. I mean, you've been complaining about Lois for the past two and a half years, especially during that whole time she was living on the farm."

"Which time?" I asked, leaning back against the kitchen counter.

"Both actually and now she's all swooning because you kissed her."

"The 'Green Arrow' kissed her."

"Oh please. How dumb do you think I am? Jimmy gave me the whole break down of the daring rescue---villian tossing and all-----and Oliver's well-timed entrance into the alley way. Besides, I don't know anyone else on Earth who can run faster than a thousandth of a second shutter speed. Ergo, Oliver's the GA and you were covering for him by laying one on Lois."

"Hey! It wasn't exactly like it was my idea. Your cousin's the one who wanted to thank me with her tongue."

"Mental images abound. Come on, Clark, you're also the strongest guy on the planet. If you didn't want to be kissing her, you would have gently---you know so as not to dislocate her jaw---pushed her away. I saw Jimmy's pics. That kiss lasted for a pretty damn long time."

She had me there. There really wasn't a justifiable reason why I hadn't pushed Lois off of me any sooner. It sure as Hell hadn't endeared me to Oliver and it seemed to be making Chloe pretty upset as well. She was glaring at me, waiting for my response, the humor drained from her tone. Why had I let Lois kiss me? Why had I kissed back? Couldn't I just chock it up to a really rotten couple of days? After all, all the news about Lana and Lex had pretty much fried my brain. It had also made me realize how desolate my "love life" had become. Lois had been the first person who'd kissed me since Chloe and it had felt nice to have that kind of attention.

And, you know, Lois was very attractive in that Playboy bunny way. I'd have to be blind not to notice that.

Yet, those didn't feel like the full reason either.

Chloe rolled her eyes. "Do you and your memories want to be alone? I think there's some nice body lotions in the bathroom and even candles to set the mood. I can't believe---"

And that was when Chloe yelped and jumped off the sofa so fast that she might have made an even better match for Bart Allen than he'd originally thought. Soon, I had her wrapped around me, looking back at the sofa, and at the tiny bundle of fur poking out from the couch cushions.

"What the Hell was that?"

"Chlo, if you release the death grip on my arm, I'll show you." I felt Chloe's nails stop digging into my forearms, and, freed, I made my way over to the couch. I bent down low and carefully picked up the squirming silver-furred bundle in question. He was tiny and fit easily in the palm of my right hand. I grinned back at her. "This, Chloe, is your new roommate."

"Oh great. Now it's pigeons at work and rats in my sofa. Is there some great vermin conspiracy against me that I've not been informed about?"

Pigeons? Well that certainly was a new one. Walking slowly back to her, I held up my hand so she could see him. "He's not a rat. He's a ferret."

"A what?"

"It's sort of like a weasel but domesticated." I said, stroking his humped back and smiling as he arched his neck around to lick my finger.

"How did the ferret get into my apartment?"

"Technically isn't it Lois's name on the lease?"

"Let's not bring your girlfriend into this."

"For the hundredth time she is not my girlfriend!" I said, yelling. Apparently, ferrets had ears as sensitive as…well…mine. The little guy made a weird sort of cooing noise and his tail fur puffed out like a cat's. "See, now you made me scare him."

"Scare him? That thing popped out of my bed and nosed my hand without warning." She crossed her arms over her chest. "Stop stalling. Why is he in my house?"

I moved the ferret into the crook of my arm and made a few cooing noises at him to try and calm him down. Honestly, I didn't know much more about ferrets than Chloe did, but I'd developed this special gentle tone for working with the more skittish horses on the farm and it seemed to work well for calming scared animals. In a few seconds, he'd stopped shaking and had closed his eyes, comfortable enough to take a nap right there in the bend of my elbow joint.

Turning back to Chloe, I grinned sheepishly. "I might have bought him."

"You bought a ferret for your farm and brought it all the way over to my apartment in order to release it on my sofa?"

"I might have kind of bought it for you." I mumbled.

Chloe's mouth hung open and she blinked her eyes a few times, clearly trying to process the information. "Okay, I'll bite. Why did you buy me a ferret?"

"Well, it was going to be a puppy, but the Smallville pet shop was out of them."

Chloe pinched the bridge of her nose and when she spoke it was slow with each word clearly enunciated as if I were a little "slow." "Why did you want to buy me a puppy?"

"Well I felt bad so I wanted to make it up to you."

"We've fought before and that has never resulted in the offering of small rodents in order to eek out forgiveness."

"Weasel. Ferrets aren't rodents; they eat them."

"Did you memorize a book about them or something in the course of the day?"

Well, I did sort of look over the owner's guide I'd bought at the pet shop along with this really cool cage with like eight plastic fun tubes coming out of it and a collection of squeaky toys. Since I had a photographic memory, it was easy to retain all the most important fun facts. And the less important ones. Like did you know that ferrets were domesticated 300 years before the Egyptians? See, I told you, useless facts. I really am missing my calling by not going on Jeopardy.

"I might have read up on them." I frowned and stroked the ferret on his nose. "You don't like him?"

Chloe shook her head, her expression softening. Maybe I was playing a little bit dirty by giving her my patented puppy eyes, but it did seem to be working. She didn't seem to be mad anymore. "Clark, he's really very cute and it's very sweet that you bought me a present---a pooping, vet bill accruing present---but I'm failing to understand why you felt bad to begin with. I thought we made up and everything. Look, I'm really not mad at you for the whole argument thing; you don't need to come bearing fuzzies."

The ferret turned around in my arm and yawned, pink tongue sticking out. It was very cute. Maybe something was wrong with me besides the faulty logic of rushing out to buy Chloe a random pet. First, I was all awestruck by the cuteness of Lana's baby and now I was getting very attached to the weasel.

I seriously needed more macho guy friends. That did it. Oliver and I were going to a Sharks game next weekend and we were going to do manly things like eat nachos until we puked (okay since he puked, considering I had that whole invulnerable constitution working for me).

Sighing I sat back down on the couch and waited for her to follow me. She hesitated at first, sparing a cautious glance at the little guy, and then sat down next to me. "Oh the fight's fine. I had it coming and you called me on it. I wasn't worried about that at all."

"So…" Chloe asked, gesturing with her hands.

I sighed. "I know that Lana came to see you."

"How? I haven't called you the traditional five times today."

"Pigeons kept you busy, huh?"

"You have no idea," she said, smiling. "Since, I didn't tell you about my little tête-à-tête with Lana, I'm assuming she finally staged that showdown at the OK corral that you two were heading for."

I blinked for a minute, trying to translate Chloe-speak. I may be the alien, but she's the one who has her own language. "She came to the loft today if that's what you mean."

"It is. I'm the one who told her to do it. Acting as a go-between for you two is too much of a liability. If you'd ever just have an honest conversation without all the eighth grade he said-she said, things would be simpler."

"Well we had a real conversation this time."

"Didn't go well, I'm guessing."

"Does it ever?"

She nodded and reached out for my shoulder. "Are you okay?"

"I will be. I mean, it's not like I'm still in love with her."

"You're not?" Chloe's tone was amused. "Is it because of your new girlfriend?"

Oh for the love of god. "For the last time---"

And just like that, Chloe had her index finger pressed to my lips. "Shh. You're going to wake the baby. He is a baby isn't he? I just assumed he was going to get bigger."

"He's about six weeks old." I said, blushing. I had a real genius for waking the little guy up. My shouting had perked him right up and he was squirming a little in my arms. The books said that a ferret could squeeze in between any space their head could fit. However, I didn't think that description fit for Kryptonian arms. That little guy could squirm all he wanted. He wasn't going anywhere.

"So," Chloe said, reaching over to pet the ferret and laughing a little when he licked her hand. "What changed besides the midnight alley rendezvous, since I saw you at The Talon and your talk with Lana this afternoon? What happened to not wanting to live with regrets?"

"The baby."

"Yeah, that would do it."

"I mean, you told me, Lex told me, but it wasn't quite like it was real, you know? But then she invited herself over to the loft."

"The whole undying love declaration bit?"

Chloe, besides having a unique language also had a talent for boiling down the big dramatic concepts into easy and cynical bite-sized pieces. It might be part of the reason we worked so well together. Despite her fascination with the bizarre, she was a realist whereas I was definitely more of a daydreamer. She always had a knack for snapping me back into reality when I needed it.

"She wanted to know it I'd take her back. It was weird."

"Your dream girl whom you stopped dating but never actually got over wanted to get back together and instead you're here with your girl Friday and a weasel, and all you can say is it was weird."

I quirked my head at her. "What kind of guy do you take me for?"

"Well, extraterrestrial origins aside, you're pretty much like all guys and all men are pretty much pigs, so…"

"Did you ever tell James this particular theory?"

"Oh he's not exempt from the broad, sweeping generalization. I just love him better than most men."

Most, huh? "Do I get put under your blanket of protection there, Chlo?"

She nodded. "You just slip in. Still, I kind of thought that you'd jump at a chance to get back on the roller coaster, especially since Lana seemed to want you back so badly.

I snorted. "First of all, Lana doesn't know what she wants. A month ago she and Lex were living that happy rich-guy lifestyle without her so much as letting me talk to her and all of a sudden she wants me back? I think a lot of it was more about her being scared of commitment with Lex than completely about being in love with me."

"Still," Chloe added, her tone breezy but her heartbeat thundering in her chest, "it must have been tempting."

"Well I am a guy, like you said. Letting her go was the hardest thing I ever did and, yeah, a part of me will always love her but there's a lot of stuff between us that just was never gonna work."

Chloe rubbed my shoulder a little and I leaned into the touch, being careful not to let the ferret slip through my grasp. "I know. I'm sorry you couldn't tell her."

And there was that talent Chloe had for also homing right in on the thing that bothered me the most. I had stood there and watched Lana beg me, more upset than I'd almost ever seen her, and I'd been so tempted to tell her, but I hadn't done it. Some of it was just plain common sense and self preservation: telling the king of unethical medical experiment's girlfriend that you were an alien ranked just this side of suicidal. Not that I thought Lana would tell him on purpose, not really. It just was a monumentally stupid idea. But it was also the risk in letting anyone else know. My life was pretty much the ultimate in cloak and dagger.

I reached up and placed my weasel-free hand on top of Chloe's. "I worry about you, you know?"

"Clark, I think you need to go back to journalism because your non-sequitirs just keep coming fast and furious." She quipped.

"You know the main reason I didn't tell Lana is that it's too dangerous to know. You know why Pete left Smallville. If something ever happened to you…"

Chloe rolled her eyes and slapped my hand. "Oh please. I save your butt half the time and help take out meteor mutants on a regular basis. I'm not going to get hurt. Besides, I'm a Metropolis girl. We're built tough."

"Like Fords." I say grinning up at her.

"God, only a farmboy would make that comparison." She shook her head, but kept her hand on mine. It felt nice. "Still, I know how much you wish you could tell her and just be with her." She was still smiling, but it was tight, as if it took all her concentration to keep it in place. Sometimes, despite her dismissal of our kiss at the DP as her "laying one" on me and Jimmy Olsen, I thought Chloe still might have some non-friendly feelings for me. Maybe it was just wishful thinking on my part.

"Maybe but now there's a baby."

"And we had that newsflash two days ago. Glad you can keep up with the rest of us, Clark."

"No, Chlo, you don't understand. I could see the baby, hear him or her."

Chloe blinked. "I forget sometimes about the heightened senses thing since it's not quite as cool as the superspeed and strength." She swallowed. "So you saw it?"

"Him or her," I corrected absentmindedly. "I have this thing about referring to sentient beings as 'it,' but yeah. It was like having a conversation with a third person ease dropping. Forgetting any of our other issues, I couldn't just get back together with her when the baby had a front row seat for the whole thing. It wouldn't have been fair to the little tyke and it wouldn't have been fair to Lex."

Chloe snorted. "Yeah and Lex plays fair so often."

"True, but I do and I'm not going to break up somebody's family especially with an innocent child present. I mean, it's not like the baby could hear or anything, but still he/she was there."

"That must have been weird."

"Welcome to the story of my life. Now who's late on the uptake? Long story short, when she came over and begged me to tell me her my secret for like the 120th time, she mentioned that you were helping to cover it up. She sounded kind of pissed."

Chloe dropped her hand and placed it alongside her other one in her lap. "She wasn't happy. When I tried to assure her that I wasn't trying to hurt her, she dismissed me. Actually did it by making a comparison to you. Oh, true love."

I nodded. Sometimes I really wish I hadn't dragged Chloe into my crazy life. Just because there were issues between me and Lana shouldn't mean that Chloe should lose her friend over it. "Yeah, I'm sorry about that."

"Oh, please, it was my choice. If I'm not going to publish my Pulitzer Prize winning article on you or reveal all under the threat of extreme torture, do you really think I'd give it up to Lana? I told you once, Clark, I'm a big girl and I've made my choices, and I'm going to choose you over her every time. We were friends first and you save me every day. How can she compete with that?"

"I don't save you every day. It's more like a once every two weeks thing."

She shook her head and put her hand back on my arm, running her fingers gently across it. "When I say every day I mean it. I mean, there's a reason I call you at least twice a day from my desk and make sure I have time on my schedule to share my lunch break with you. I…" she stopped and shook her head, seeming to catch herself. "You're my best friend, hands down."

Best friend, huh? One didn't need superhearing to catch the hesitation in her voice or the way she'd almost slipped up and said something else. Something I very much suspected would contain the words "love" and "you" in them. Not to mention the fact Chloe was distracted enough to use a cliché. Thinking straight!Chloe wouldn't use a cliché even if someone threatened to burn her press pass. "Thanks, Chloe. That means a lot."

Stupid, stupid, stupid. That would have been the time, quasi-rodent or not snuggled in my arms, to grab the girl and kiss her. Well, I always have had lousy timing, and I've always been a huge coward when it comes to pursuing Chloe. I've found I'm really good at backing down and denying things.

"So, I guess it's safe to say that I'm not going to be on Lana's Christmas card list next year." Chloe quipped.

"See," I said, picking up the ferret in my left hand and depositing it on Chloe's lap.

At first, she gave a very unChloe-like shriek, "A little warning before you set the furry menace down on parts unknown."

"Sorry," I said chuckling.

She reached down and picked the little guy up, as she struggled to keep him from escaping her grasp as he squirmed. She didn't have the advantage of limbs of steel like I did. "Let me guess, then. You bought him in order to make up for the fact that I lost a friend."

"Well it seemed like a really good idea at the time."

"You know a weasel isn't really an even trade for Lana, right?"

"I know that, but it was the best I could do. I figured he might help if you got a little lonely. How you made it so long without any type of pet, I'll never know."

"We can't all have a farm-full of animals, Dr. Dolittle." She said, tickling under the ferret's chin and giggling when he stuck out his tongue. "He really is cute."

"See, that's more like it." I said, crossing my hands over my chest. I knew it was a good idea. Chloe was smiling in that blinding way she had. She always looked so beautiful when she did it. "His cage is hidden in the bathroom, do you wanna see it?"

"Maybe later. I can't afford to get my work clothes too dirty."

"It might be a little late for that."

"He's not peeing on me, is he? Because I will beat you with Kryptonite if he has. I am not above resorting to violence, Kent."

"That's definitely a Sullivan-Lane family trait. Why does Lois keep punching me in the shoulder?"

"Lois hits most guys in the shoulder. It's something she learned on the base. A better question would be how come she hasn't shattered all the bones in her hand pulling that stunt?"

I shrugged, genuinely mystified. "I have no idea. Maybe she's really a Zen ninja master who breaks concrete in her spare time." Chloe arched her eyebrow at me. "Or maybe she's just been insanely lucky. Who knows?"

"You know what I don't get?"

"What?" I asked, not really loving where the conversation was going.

"Why you made out with Lois."

And we were back to that again. I was definitely beginning to suspect that Chloe's crush on me had not disappeared. "Lay one on you" my ass. "And I don't get how Lana knows you know. You're way better at lying than I am. Remember the time you had Pete convinced that if he ate enough Skittles, his skin would turn rainbow-colored."

She giggled. "Don't remind me. His mom still wants reimbursement for the dental bills. Oh, and nice technique by the way with all that deflection. Do you wanna answer first or should I?"

"You please," I insisted, giving her my best puppy eyed look. It was just as well the Spengler's hadn't had any puppies in stock. Shelby gave me enough competition when it came to overall cuteness.

"Stupid Kent charm. It's like a secret weapon, I tell you." Chloe gave the ferret an extra long stroke down its back and bit her lip. "You're not really going to like it."

"Compared to the last 48 hours I can't imagine how much worse news could get." Chloe blanched and I wanted to kick myself. Saying that you couldn't see how things could get worse was the kiss of death. I had seriously just jinxed myself. Besides in a town like Smallville, it could always get worse, like evil intergalactic dictators or sociopathic billionaires worse.

"We were setting up this sting with a hidden webcam to prove that Linda Lake was a meteor mutant."

"She's a mutant?"

Chloe shook her head. "Yeah, I didn't get the chance to let you in on that little tidbit when you were conspiring with Oliver Queen alias Green Arrow. Anyway, I figured out she was a mutant who was using her powers to spy on people and get dirt, but it's not like the editor of the Planet was going to believe that so I had to prove it. Hence, webcam."

"And Lana was monitoring the transmission on the other end."

She smiled a little, but her posture was still rigid and her heartbeat quick. "Maybe you aren't as slow as you look, farmboy."

"I still don't see how that leads back to me, unless…" And then I just knew. The only reason Chloe would even acknowledge that there was a secret to keep would be if someone else made the accusation first and the only someone around to make accusations had to have been Lake herself. I'd never actually done it before, but I was pretty sure I was about to throw up. "Linda knows, doesn't she?"

"Yes."

This was monumentally bad. No, it was worse than that. Bad was crazy genocidal androids and renegade supercriminals, but exposure was something so much worse. Linda Lake was the biggest gossip in Metropolis and everybody read her column. She'd find some way to convince the Planet to print what she'd found out. After all, it would be hot gossip, wouldn't it? Not only was I the son of a state senator, but I was one third of the juiciest love triangle to hit Kansas in ages. Oh, I was going to be locked up and then they were going to cut me open and then they were going to…

Chloe's hand on my arm snapped me back from all the worst case scenarios running through my head. "Clark, calm down. You're hyperventilating."

Well, that was a first. I'd never done that before. I should make note of it so they could study that phenomenon at the top secret evil lab I was going to be living in.

Chloe reached out and grabbed my face in between her hands and forced me to look at her. Happy to be freed, the ferret start scrabbling about and trying to climb the back of the sofa. "Clark, think for a second. Lana and I did our little recon last night. If Linda had been able to publish anything on you, she already would have."

I swallowed and when I spoke it was barely above a whisper. "Why didn't she?"

"She's dead."

"How?"

"Car accident. She didn't take too well to me confronting her and she chased me out onto the street and we sort of had a cat fight. She pounced, I rolled, and she flew out into oncoming traffic."

"Chloe! You tried to take out a meteor mutant without me. Are you crazy?"

"You were indisposed and it wasn't supposed to be a confrontation. I was just going to bug her office. Her showing up was just a bonus. Besides," Chloe added giving a forced laugh, "now I can add 'shot at by nail gun' to my sidekick resume."

That did it. I flipped into X-ray vision immediately, trying to make sure that there weren't any huge gaping holes in my best friend.

Chloe rolled her eyes. "Are you X-raying me?"

"Maybe. You don't seem to be hurt."

"I said shot at by nail gun not actually hit by nail gun. It's all in the semantics."

"I wish you wouldn't do all the investigating. You could get hurt or apparently impaled."

"And I kicked Linda Lake's couture-covered butt," She said, lowering her hands and giving my left arm a squeeze. "I'm fine. We're both fine. I took a hammer to her computer and there's no way anyone could have recovered her files on you." She grinned up at me, pride coloring her voice. "No one's going to get my alien."

"Intergalactic traveler." I corrected, grinning back at her.

"So," she said, leaning back into the sofa. "That covers my half of explanation time. Are you going to tell me how come you had your tongue half way down my cousin's throat?"

I was going to kill Jimmy Olsen. The guy was bringing me nothing but trouble. First he steals my…um…my Chloe, and then he takes the incriminating photos of Lois kissing me. "I don't know."

"You can do better than that, Clark. You're a writer."

"Retired." I said. That was another argument for another time. Chloe'd been pressuring me in the last couple of months to start taking a few classes at Central Kansas. She'd even suggested that I try out for The Ledger's mini-internship program. She wanted me back in the reporting biz.

"I guess I got into kissing Lois because she reminded me of someone."

"I didn't know Lois and Lana were that much alike."

Oh for the love of god. Couldn't anyone in the Sullivan-Lane gene pool let anything drop? "She didn't remind me of Lana, you idiot, she reminded me of you!" I shouted again, filled to overflowing with frustration. It made the windows rattle and it startled the ferret so badly that he fell right off the sofa and ran across the floor and under Lois's bed.

As romantic declarations went, it kind of sucked.

Chloe blinked. "It what?"

"It reminded me of you. Are you happy now? She kissed me and I gave in because with my eyes closed I could pretend it was you. I could pretend we were back at the Daily Planet and I was having the best kiss of my life."

"I…you're lying."

"I am not. Do you think I can even stand Lois Lane? The only reason I tolerate her is because of you and because my mom would kill me if I were rude to her." I add as an after thought. "The things I can even stand about her, the things I almost kind of like, are the traits she shares with you. Lois is a pale----and infinitely more annoying--- imitation of you, Chlo."

"You're lying."

"You said that already." I said before I leaned down and kissed her, giving her the exact same treatment I'd given her cousin the previous night, except this time I wanted to be doing it from the start. I loved the girl I was kissing.

Chloe broke apart from me, drawing in deep breaths. See, that was one of the many weird things about being me. I didn't need to breath as often as humans did, so sometimes I'd just keep up the kissing long past the point where a normal guy would have needed air. She drew in a few more ragged breaths, trying to regain her composure. "I…what about Jimmy?"

Olsen again. "I was here first. He swooped down in that interim period while I was trapped in the Phantom Zone and that's not fair. I had serious plans for following up on our Daily Planet kiss and then I get back and all of a sudden you and James," I spit the name out the same way I used to complain about mucking out horse stalls to my dad. "…are making googly-eyes at each other."

"I am not a territory you claim with a flag."

I place my hand gently under her chin and force her to look up at me. "I know that and I shouldn't have backed down when I first came back but I was scared and I didn't want to scare you off." She had to understand that. She just had to. She'd done the same thing to me right after the tornadoes freshman year; Chloe knew what a mistake playing it safe had been.

"I…I have to talk to Jimmy first before this goes any farther. He's a good guy, and I won't two-time him and I won't lie to him."

I nodded. I actually had expected as much. Chloe had incredible integrity. It was the main reason she fit in so well at the Daily Planet. It wasn't her talent, even though she was phenomenally skilled. It was her honesty, her dedication to the truth that truly made her worthy of the DP. It was also what made her such a loyal friend. I was struck for a second how different she was from Lana. Chloe was honest and forthright and told you what she thought. Not in that blunt and tactless Lois way either. She was honest but gentle. Lana was, for all her rants about secrets and lies (and yes I know I had the bulk of those rants coming), manipulative, a master of passive-aggression.

Chloe would play the hand she was dealt and never complain about it. She'd find a way to make it work for her no matter what, and she'd excel. If she were in Lana's place, she'd try and make it work with the father of her child, I was certain of it.

I admired her for that, loved her for it.

"Agreed. Nothing goes any farther until you can break the news to Jimmy."

"Right." She said, nodding. Suddenly a loud crash rang out from under Lois's bed. "Crap! We forgot about the ferret."

I supersped across the apartment and looked down under the covers. The little guy had apparently climbed on top of a stack of paper backs and managed to knock them to the floor. Reading through a few of the covers, I snickered. Lois was a closet Harlequin romance fan. Of course who was I to judge? Maybe "Robin Hood's Kiss" was an excellent read.

I was lying under the bed on my stomach, my hands out in front of me. The ferret was in front of me, his eyes glowing red in the shadows. I made a move to grab him at human speed, and he half-hopped, half-shuffled backwards. I sighed. "I guess we're doing this the hard way, little guy." I reached for him in superspeed and was already standing up by Chloe's side by the time he'd processed what had happened. He was shaking in my hands and his eyes were wide. "Sorry. I tried to do it the easy way, but you wouldn't cooperate."

I flinched out of long-practiced habit when Chloe slapped me on the back of the head. "You scared him! Give my baby here."

"He's you're baby now, is he? Half an hour ago you wanted me to call the exterminator." I said, placing the ferret in her waiting arms.

Chloe stroked his head and let him burrow deeper into her arms. I could already see the shaking subsiding. "Did big dumb Clark scare you?" She was cooing at him, kissing his head, and I'm ashamed to admit it but I was kind of jealous. Until Chloe talked to Jimmy, the ferret would be getting more kisses from her than I would. Satisfied that her baby would recover, she glared up at me. "You didn't have to use superspeed. It scared him."

That was sure an ego booster. "He'll get used to it. All the animals on the farm are, except the horses, but Shelby gets a real kick out of trying to play tag with me."

"I'll bet."

"So," I asked, leaning back against the kitchen counter. "What are you going to name him?"

She furrowed her brow. "How about Rocky, you know like the squirrel from Rocky and Bullwinkle."

I stuck out my tongue. "I don't think that's going to work. He's way better than some stupid squirrel. He needs a much cooler name. Ooh, how about Krypto?"

"With a K-R-Y, I imagine." She shook her head. "Nope."

"Why not?"

"Because it's stupid. No offense to your planet of origin, but it really doesn't fit him."

God, so some things really were genetic, like aversion to really cool names. "Alright then, your turn. You try something."

She paused for a second, staring down at him and biting her lip. Suddenly, a bright smile lit up her face and she looked back at me. "I.T."

"It? You're naming your pet after a Stephen King novel?"

"No, not the word 'it.' I mean just the abbreviation I.T."

"That's kind of weird." Which I know was a slightly stupid thing for me to accuse anyone of being because I have the gold, silver, and bronze medals in the weird Olympics. "What's does I.T. stand for?"

"I thought that would be obvious." Chloe said, rolling her eyes when I just stared at her blankly and muttering something about the myth of highly evolved alien life forms. "Fine, let me help you out here. I.T., intergalactic traveler."

"Ah, Chlo, that was just a joke and a pretty bad one at that. Besides, he isn't even from outer space."

"You never know. This is Smallville. Besides, I like the name, it reminds me of my favorite farmboy."

"What are you going to do when people ask you what it stands for?"

She half shrugged, hitching up her left shoulder, but being careful not to wake up the weasel in question. "I'll tell them that I've seen that eBay commercial one too many times or that I really like information and technology. I'm a bit of a computer geek."

"Well, I'm a bit of a regular geek, so I'd say we make a great couple."

"Finally, you get it." She said, making her way to the bathroom and putting the tired out I.T. back in his cage. "It took you long enough."

Yeah, six and a half years was a very long time. I guess Chloe was right and I was pretty slow on the uptake. I stood next to her on the threshold between the main room and the bathroom and followed her gaze so that I was watching I.T. as well. I put my arm around her and let her lean into me. That was a nice platonic gesture until the Jimmy-ban was lifted. Plus it allowed for body contact. That was a big plus. I leaned down and planted a kiss on the top of her head.

She wasn't the girl I thought I'd end up with and our odd little band wasn't exactly the family I thought I'd have, but I wouldn't trade this moment right here for a billion dollars.


End file.
